Not every child can say:
“I feel sad.”
“I need my mom to be by my side.”
Especially for many children with autism, emotions are not always expressed through words. They may appear through silence, avoiding eye contact, or behaviors that adults may find difficult to understand. And sometimes, a gentle and appropriate hug can become a “language” of love and connection.
Science has shown that when people experience positive physical touch, such as hugging or holding hands, while feeling safe and comfortable, the body can release Oxytocin – a hormone associated with bonding and connection. At the same time, it may help reduce Cortisol, a hormone related to stress. Therefore, a suitable hug can help children feel more relaxed and emotionally regulated.
For children with autism, many studies on Deep Pressure Stimulation (DPS) also suggest that gentle and appropriate pressure, such as a hug when a child is ready to receive it, may help some children feel calmer, reduce anxiety, and support emotional regulation.
However, the most important thing is not about giving more hugs, but about giving the **right kind of hug at the right time**.Some children may run into their parents’ arms whenever they feel tired or overwhelmed. Some may only feel comfortable holding hands. Others may need a lot of time to feel safe with physical touch.
Therefore, love is not about forcing a child to accept a hug. It is about learning to listen to their signals and respecting their needs. When a child is ready, a hug does more than provide comfort — it sends a simple but powerful message:“You are not alone in facing this world.”
At VICA, we believe that every child has their own unique way of experiencing love. What adults need to do is not change the way children feel and connect, but patiently discover the path that helps each child feel the safest.
Sometimes, the journey of connection does not begin with words. It begins with presence, understanding, and a gentle hug… when the child is truly ready.
